


Reaching For

by Fairyglass



Category: Stargate - All Media Types, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Angst, Implied Relationships, M/M, Other, Thing - Freeform, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2019-10-23
Packaged: 2020-12-28 20:06:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21142439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fairyglass/pseuds/Fairyglass
Summary: Jack has been promoted to General and is now The Man.  Sam has been promoted and is now in Area 51. Teal'c has had a promotion (of sorts) and is now leading the Free Jaffa on Dakara.  And Daniel - is still Daniel.  And wants to ship out on the Prometheus to Atlantis.  Jack isn't keen on this at all, what so ever.Written April 2006 for LJ Daniel 100 Community.Something of a tag for S8Ep12Prometheus Unbound





	Reaching For

**Author's Note:**

> Written: April 11th, 2006
> 
> Spoilers: Season 8, pre-but-related-to [Prometheus Unbound](https://www.gateworld.net/sg1/s8/prometheus-unbound/)
> 
> Themes: Semi-established Jack/Daniel, Semi-eluded Sam/Jack, Angst, UST
> 
> Challenge 004 :: Theme Songs
> 
> Has a song really ever struck you as being “just so Daniel”? The lyrics, the melody, the beat - something that really captures a quality, a moment, of Daniel Jackson for you. Or maybe it’s a teammate, flipping through their CD collection and come across something in a way they’ve never pieced together before.
> 
> This week, think of those songs and let them inspire you to put all that into words. It’s like a fan mixtape of one, for one.

_Oh love, get out of my hair._  
_You’ll never get to heaven if you stay in my bed._  
_And I don’t think twice, I’ll lose control,_  
_Don’t think twice, you’ll never ever fold._

They fought in the halls. They fought in the commissary. They fought in the elevators between the halls and the commissary. They fought anywhere and everywhere. There was absolutely no one left in the SGC who didn’t know Doctor Jackson wanted to join the Prometheus in its expedition to the Pegasus Galaxy and the city of Atlantis. Just as there was no one left in the SGC who didn’t know General O’Neill wasn’t having any of it. It’d been going on now for weeks.

“Daniel!”

“Jack, damn it, I don’t see how you can keep being so--”

“General here, Daniel! Guy in charge? Pretend you have a little respect for the uniform, okay? At least in front of the _children_.” He swung his hand in the direction of a posted guard who was not watching them pass in an exceedingly pointed fashion.

“The uniform? You’re being an ass! Who cares what you’re wearing while you’re doing it!?”

_The beating heart is over their own--_  
_Hello, hello, hello I think you’re out on your own._  
_Well it may seem funny but it don’t strike honey for me._

Daniel was hounding Jack. If Jack had his way, he’d lock himself in his office and just hide it out, but those weren’t options any more now that he was The Man. Daniel had ample opportunity to nip at his heels all - day - long. It’d worked in the past, so Daniel figured it was only a matter of time before he got his way. But Jack was being uniquely stubborn on this point and Daniel had to admit, it had him stumped.

“I don’t get it, Sam.” Arching over the back of his chair to stretch tired muscles, Daniel sighed down the line towards Area 51. “How would this be any more or less dangerous than anything else we’ve ever done?”

Sam’s voice had the familiar lilt of her smile. “Daniel, no offense, but our track record aboard the Prometheus isn’t exactly the best.”

She was teasing him but Sam, more than anyone else, was keenly aware just how important it was for Daniel to reach Atlantis. She’d been given her own slice of heaven, hadn’t she? You couldn’t walk four feet without bumping into some fantastic doohickey in Area 51. Why couldn’t Daniel have that too?

“Give him time,” she advised gently. “You’re pushing too hard, too fast, and the Prometheus isn’t scheduled to leave for another five weeks.” A thoughtful silence fell between them and Sam spun it out as long as she could to give her next words as much weight as they needed. “Daniel, for as adaptable as O’Neill is, he doesn’t really like change. And things are... well.”

General Hammond had retired, Carter had been promoted and then transferred to Area 51. Teal’c was on Dakara, organizing the Free Jaffa Nation and now Daniel wanted to ship out to Atlantis. All while Jack stayed right where he was. Without them.

Dragging his glasses off his face, Daniel signed again into the phone. “Yeah. Yeah, I know.” But damn it all anyway.

_Agree me my way, agree me back home,_  
_I can love you baby till the cows came home._  
_What’s that noise, oh yeah it’s the cows knocking on our door!_

_Oh, oh no, you’re coming around to my place!_  
_Oh no, and I’m getting tired of your face._  
_Who left the lights off, baby? Who left the lights off, baby?_

_Yeah, oh no! The cows are all turned on their heads._  
_Oh no, the cows are all lying in our bed._  
_And I’m not listening to what you’re trying to say to me._

The door swung open in a whoosh that pulled at Daniel’s clothes. “Hi.”

Jack squinted out at him with instant regret. “It’s Sunday. In fact, it’s quarter to seven on Sunday.”

“Yeah, I know. I thought we might... talk?”

Giving him a slow, blinking appraisal, Jack jabbed a finger into his sleepy eye to rub desperately. “No, Daniel. We’re not doing this again, here, now.”

“But Jack--!” Already the hands, with their long fingers, were dashing about in their own language and Jack was in no state to keep up with all that was Daniel Jackson. Not at six forty-five in the morning. On a Sunday. When Jack was still in his sleep sweats and Daniel looked more bright-eyed and bushy-tailed then Jack thought he had any right to look. This was an ambush, pure and simple.

He closed the door. Then locked the door. Then thought about pulling the couch in front of the door. Daniel was going to be the death of him! And it was just too early to die.

On the other side, Daniel ground his teeth and considered kicking the door down. By nature, he wasn’t a violent man, but Jack O’Neill brought out the exceptional in him.

_Oh dog, get out of my way,_  
_I’ll never get to heaven if you’re always at bay._  
_And I don’t want more, I don’t want less._  
_Happiness was never really our success._

Jack had had a very long Sunday. One in which he’d done a lot of very deep, very personal thinking - not exactly two things he tried to do often. And the whole day had started way too early for his tastes, so he’d been at it all for a while. How often did he get to sleep in? That’d be never. But now that it was a more reasonable hour....

The hour had to be the only thing reasonable about all this. He stood in front of Daniel’s front door just as the sun began to set and told himself all over again how this wasn’t just stupid but _really_ stupid.

_You gave me away, I gave you a smile:_  
_One was alligator, one was crocodile._  
_I guess it’s just somebody’s way of saying_  
_We’re not meant to be._

_Quit looking at me!_

This was a road he and Daniel had already been down and they’d decided -- mutually -- that they... well. That they couldn’t go down this road. What they did, that whole saving the world thing, was far more important than personal... roads. It had been the same with Carter, much to Jack’s personal embarrassment and private delight. Jack had never known just how much a child of the 60s he was until faced with such “decisions”. But work came first. For all of them. They were in unique positions to actually do some good and not a one of them wanted to give that up.

He knew Daniel was home. Not just by the car parked in its space, but because Jack had been standing here for just under an hour and he could hear Daniel moving around inside.

Pulling his shoulders back, and with the grim determination of a born soldier, Jack knocked crisply.

“Well it’s about time,” Daniel announced, opening the door and then leaning against the sill. He quirked a pursed mouth, eyebrow jogged expression at Jack. Well, so much for the upper hand.

_Oh no, stop spinning around in my head._  
_Oh no, I love my - love is dead._  
_Who left the lights off, baby? Who left the lights off, baby?_

_Yeah, oh no, my heart is just turned on its head!_  
_Oh no, I’m this close to burning the bed!_  
_And I’m not really getting what you’re trying to say to me._

“Because.”

“'Because' is not an answer.”

They stood in Daniel’s living room, Jack with his hands in his pockets and Daniel with his arms tucked around himself. It was a posture and position Jack was used to seeing Daniel take but somehow, somewhere in all the years, it’d stopped being a defensive stance, something vulnerable, and had turned into a formidable force to be reckoned with. Daniel was Being Serious and his bold attempt to hold and keep Jack’s eye contact made Jack look out the windows.

“Because... Daniel... because-- I--” Because Jack had never stopped loving Daniel, had never stopped wondering ‘what if’. Never stopped thinking they could have actually made it work. If they’d tried. It didn't have the added layer of Career Air Force like Sam, so maybe would have been easier if they'd pushed the line after all. Because what if Daniel never came back from Atlantis, found it more fascinating then anything they could offer him here. More then Jack could offer him. Or what if the Wraith, and Jack wouldn’t be there to.... 

“Because.”

Carter just wanted to go to Nevada. He could keep tabs on Nevada. But Daniel -- Daniel! -- he just had to one-up her. He had to want to go to another galaxy. Jack thought to venture a look in the doctor’s direction but decided against it abruptly, instead staring past Daniel and into the hallway. Yep. Because. Hallway.

“Jack.”

Yep. Hallway.

“Jack!” More urgent now. Hallway.

“Damn you, Jack O’Neill. Are you trying to tell me...?”

Yep.

_Oh no, the cows have come home for their tea!_  
_Oh no, I’m thinking I want to be free._

“Now. You’re coming to me with... _this_... now.” Daniel pinned the side of Jack’s neck with a stare. A glare. It had to be his neck because Jack wouldn’t turn to look at him.

“I’m not doing anything but standing here. You’re the one jumping to conclusions.”

“Well! With such insightful rhetoric as ‘Because’!”

“Damn it, Daniel!” Jack threw his head back and snarled at the ceiling.

“Jack, just shut up! Just... just... God.” Sailing his hand between them, Daniel made a halting motion. A placating motion. Stop. I’m sorry. This isn’t the way to handle things.

Jack glanced down, held his breath, scuffed his toe against the hardwood floors and basically for all the world looked like a love-struck teenager deep in the fits of an unrequited declaration. But it wasn't that it was unrequited, just possibly too late.

“Jack.” Tilting his head, Daniel’s expression was pained. Now. Jack was coming to him now, with this, almost four years since... last time. Just when he thought they were over everything, were moving on. Did Daniel even want this still? Atlantis! Why did it have to be such a one or the other decision with Jack?

_Yeah, oh no, stop clouding our tears in my head!_  
_Oh no, I’m thinking I want you out._  
_And I’m not hearing what you’re trying to get through to me_  
_To me_  
_To me_  
_To me_  
_To me!_

“Look,” Jack’s intonation soft and rich with unexpressed emotion, a burr of sound coming up from somewhere long out of practice. “I should probably go. Give you some... space.” Like maybe a corner in the Pegasus galaxy.

“Jack.” Look at me, it said. Only a linguist could say a single word so many different ways. With obvious reluctance, Jack drew his eyes up from the floor and turned to finally face Daniel.

It was there, all of it, still laid bare between them. When Daniel had descended, the first time and everything had been so raw between them -- but they’d decided Anubis’ threat had to take priority, that their own wants and needs couldn’t weigh more than the fate of entire planets. And then things had just... kept going. Like that. Kept going, but never went away.

“Daniel, I--”

“No, Jack, I understand. It’s alright.”

“No,” Jack glared. “It isn’t.”

“No,” Daniel readily agreed. “It isn’t.”

Jack shuffled his hands in his pockets. “So... now what?”

_But do you love me?_  
_Uhm..._

**Author's Note:**

> Song: ‘Who Left the Lights Off, Baby’ by the Guillemots 
> 
> YouTube: <https://youtu.be/KpYuZCR_3FM>
> 
> Lyrics: <https://genius.com/Guillemots-who-left-the-lights-off-baby-lyrics>


End file.
